pinch a loaf

Using your sphincter muscle to "pinch" a loaf of shit that is hanging halfway out your ass and won't drop of its own accord. Pinching a loaf always results in extra-messy wiping.

"Hurry up and finish taking a shit, we're already late! Pinch the loaf if you must!"

"Thanks for suggesting that I pinch a loaf; it worked. Now I have to spend 5 minutes wiping, then we can leave."

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tampon rock

A term coined in the late 1980's to refer to the (ahem) "sudden wave" of female folk musicians, including: Tracy Chapman, Michelle Shocked, Suzanne Vega, Toni Childs, Melissa Etheridge, The Indigo Girls, 10,000 Maniacs and others. Tampon Rock chicks were the spiritual mothers of both the Riot Grrrls and the Lilith Fair fems in the 1990s. Nowadays, the term has been re-"cycled" to refer to any folk-rock chicks who remind us of that original wave (mostly just Tegan & Sara).

Listening to Tampon Rock brings back such great memories from college days.

pinball rape

When someone "humps" a pinball machine in an attempt to nudge the ball in a certain direction, or to dislodge the ball out of a stuck position. The player humps with the pelvis because his or her hands are too busy simultaneously smacking the flipper buttons.

Sometimes pinball rape is performed as an ill-advised mating ritual display. A "tilt" can happen, causing the machine and all human on-lookers to shut down completely.

Ever since Ricky committed pinball rape on the Theater of Magic, I just can't enjoy the game at all.

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pencil neck geek

1. A grit-eatin' freak

2. A scum suckin' pea-head with a lousy physique

3. A one man, no good, losing streak.

When I was a child, Fred Blassie's song "Pencil Neck Geek" scared the holy shit out of me, probably because I am one.

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