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A direct competitor to the for-profit Sperm Bank, the Sperm Credit Union is a co-operative sperm banking venture owned collectively by depositors, who are known as members. Through careful management and economy, it can pay a little more or charge a little less as it had no outside stockholders seeking profit at members' expense.
The same pattern held in other sectors where small, local credit unions had taken on large, greedy for-profit banks. Make a deposit in Blood Credit Union and they bleed you a little less aggressively than the corporate hacks at Blood Bank. Withdraw noodles from the local Food Credit Union and be able to repay a few noodles less than would be charged by a greedy, Wall Street Food Bank. And on it goes.
The principle is the same as any other mutual or co-operative society, such as Mutual Orgasm as an insurance provider or the Building Societies as mortgage lenders. By taking matters into their own hands, members collectively obtain a more satisfying outcome.
I was initially sceptical when that trollop Beth tried to seduce me into becoming a member. What, pray tell, is a Sperm Credit Union? This sounded like something out of the idealistic free-love Summer of '69 where the Sexual Revolution, fuelled by the Pill and not yet castrated by full-scale STD panic, led to massive orgies of excess where everyone belongs to everyone else. And these Annual General Meetings? They sounded like something out of a porn flick, Bukkake Gangbang part 666.
Then she sat me down and opened the books, reviewing the prospectus and the annual reports. The business model appeared sound; infertile couples pay to borrow members' DNA â both sperm and eggs â to build their families and secure their future. Members deposit their seed and earn interest. Much like a bank, every one of the hundreds of millions of sperm every day would be individually counted, frozen, accounted for and secured. Every one of them. Everything was strictly regulated and deposits nationally insured up to a limit of a half-million sperm. Compared to the shambolic wreckage of the rest of the US banking system, the Sperm Credit Union was fiscally-prudent and well managed.
A "vaginal magic show" as a live performance which involved a magician pulling various objects out of her vagina on-stage. Originally created in Valencia, Spain by illusionist Victoria MarÃa Aragüés Gadea (b. 15 April 1943, active 1980â2015 with stage name Vicky Leyton aka Sticky Vicky).
Her daughter continued the illusion after her retirement.
Victoria's Secret? The sheer number of bizarre objects hidden in her vagina. Sticky Vicky and her secretions have engorged everything from ping-pong balls, eggs, handkerchiefs, sausages, razor blades, machetes and a lit lightbulb to a bottle of beer. Bottoms up!
Bring your bachelor party to the show and the poor bridegroom will be dragged on stage and left so scarred for life that he never dare look at another vagina.
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In homosexual male oral sex, to force the penis into the throat in such a way that it either blocks the airway or triggers gagging, coughing, retching or induces vomiting. The implication is either that the penis is abnormally large or that the sexual technique of the person receiving the oral favours is overly aggressive (for instance, pounding away at the throat as if it were a vagina).
Bigger is better, right? Blocking the throat during oral isn't sexy in real life, but that hasn't stopped the creation of multiple pornographic videos titled "gag the fag" or some variation thereof.
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A noted British police constable with an unfortunate name.
Don't rob any banks.
If you rob banks, Police Constable Rob Banks will arrest you and have the local magistrate throw you into something called a gaol.
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Who is that seedy man who keeps hanging around with that dirty hoe?
Oh, that's the gardener.
Engineering.
The various religious texts record that in the beginning there was chaos, from which a God created the heavens and earth. That's a feat of engineering. God also said "let there be light" and there was light - a task which now universally falls to the electrical engineer.
But why, then, is engineering only the second-oldest profession? The oldest profession is lawyer. Who do you think created all of that chaos?
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A pre-moistened, pre-packaged tissue used to wipe up whatever leftover sperm does not get licked, slurped, swallowed or eaten during a gangbang or orgy.
The use of baby wipes in porn only rubs in for all the spilled spermies that they will never get to make a baby.