Sugar Coated Christmas Trees

What really good marijuana looks like.

That weed is so dank; it looks like sugar coated christmas trees. Lets smoke it!

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Opening day of Shopping

Where all the women go on insane long shopping sprees followed by a night of excess alcohol, because their husbands are gone for opening day of gun season.

Sarah: Betty, its the opening day of shopping this weekend!

Betty: Ill grab his credit cards!

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Roasting Chestnut

A holiday sex move, when dirty hot sex has been going on for a long period of time, raising the body temperature of the man in turn raising his semen temperature. He nuts on the womans chest, thus a roasting chestnut.

Tim: Hey Dale what are you doing christmas day?

Dale: Visiting my in-laws at 5 which will lead to a roasting chestnut with my wife in her parents bed.

Tim: :/

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Waistband Trampoline

A technique used by men to remove excess pee from their penis after urinating in a urinal. The male bounces his penis up and down on his waistband a few times before he zips up, preventing underwear dribble.

I bounced my dick on my waistband trampoline a few times before leaving the urinal so I wouldn’t get piss pants.

have bank

Slang term for saying someone is rich. Have/had/has bank.

I went to my uncles mansion who is a brain surgeon, man did he have bank!

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Gas Pump Roulette

While pumping gas, you try to release the pump trigger at the number you want it to land on in one try. The less risky people release a few cents underneath the target number then pump the trigger until it gets to the number. It is kind of reverse of russian roulette.

Pumping gas this morning, I tried to land on 30 dollars exactly but hit $30.05 instead. I lost gas pump roulette today.

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Self-Esteem Status

A status on facebook usually made by girls purposely written in a way because she knows the comments will make her feel good/pretty/ etc.

Annoying attention whore- *thinks* I feel ugly :(. I know! I'll go on facebook and make a self-esteem status

Annoying attention whore- I wish I looked like those victoria secret models! ugh :(

nicole- omg babigurl you do! &&luvu

brenda- you look way better than them!

Dave- shut up bitch

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