Trabuco Hills High School

Hell on Earth, located in Mission Viejo, CA.

Part of the Saddleback Valley Unified School District (SVUSD).

Ruled by unjust forces of darkness that delight in and should be convicted for:

1. Oppressing the masses by means of a demonic propaganda machine known as the THHS ASB aka Anorexic Skank Brigade.
2. Running over hapless people with golf carts when they aren't looking.
3. Forcing hundreds of innocents to write letters to a single Marine that nobody even knows for no fuggin' reason whatsoever.
4. Mangling the English language (It's called a computer, not a confuser, dammit, you weak technologically illiterate fossil.)
5. Saying the Spanish words "papel" and "libros" over 27 times in a row.
6. Insulting the intelligence of the few that have it.
7. Hiding in dark corners throwing AIDS-infected syringes at unsuspecting passersby.
8. Buying shoddy Macintoshes of many aeons past.
9. Replacing the above with shoddy Macintoshes of slightly fewer aeons past.
10. Devising amazingly inefficient, stupid, backwards, and plain boring curricula.
11. Allowing racism to rear its ugly amalgamation of head and ass.
12. Sacrificing tender young infants at midnight under the full moon to ancient evil gods that desire nothing more than to bring agony and slaughter to our world.
13. Playing horrible and excessively loud music during snack time for the singular purpose of inducing mass stupor and brain damage.
14. Creating useless daily video announcements hosted by even more useless primates.
15. Forcing physical education on its undeserving subjects, which happens to be futile as the fat, slow, or unenthusiastic merely become even more fat, slow, or unenthusiastic.
16. Not being able to make a website that doesn't suck.
17. Retaining ringworm-infested wrestling mats used by ringworm-infested dipshits that should've been incinerated long ago to prevent contagion.
18. Sending out top officials of aforementioned Anorexic Skank Brigade to survey people who do not want to be surveyed when up to 2732 other people could have been surveyed instead.
19. Having an excuse for an Alma Mater worthy of being declared Shittiest Attempt At Poetry of the Geological Era.
20. Countless other heinous sins and transgressions against fundamental human rights.

The only thing Trabuco Hills High School needs is a front gate built of corpses with the words carved into it: "Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here."

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THHS ASB

Trabuco Hills High School Anorexic Skank Brigade.

Commonly masquerades as an Associated Student Body - this, however, is a lie intended to lull the populace into a false sense of security preceding their violent take over of all of North America.

A group of people (term used loosely - some are demonic manifestations) hell-bent on torturing and persecuting the innocent subjects of its parent institution, typically employing loud yelling, irritating snack rallies, excessively loud and shitty music, offensive quantities of smiling, megaphones, balloons, excessive happiness, satanic rituals, etc.

They are likely to hunt down and survey specific innocent people when 2732 other people of equal surveyability are present immediately nearby.

Unlike other forms of pure evil, creatures of the THHS ASB cannot be warded off with holy symbols unless said symbols double as heavy bludgeoning devices. However, resistance is futile and all but the most awesome will be assimilated anyway.

Bob: Ahh! Help! The THHS ASB is coming! Run for your lives or you will be eaten-AAAAARGHHH! *choke gasp bleed gurgle die*

Joe: Holy shit! They ate Bob! Nooo! *is eviscerated on the spot*

Steve: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! THE PAIN! THE PAIN! *is also eviscerated on the spot*

Humberto: Man, being eaten alive by the THHS ASB sucks almost as much as my name! AIIEEE! *is digested*

Jessica: Look at me, look at me, I'm blond, blue-eyed, a cheerleader, and popular! Look at me! ASB is great! *is tackled and knocked unconscious by a person that does not suck for being a THHS ASB supporter*

Captain: What happen!

George: Noooo! They're still coming! *has his extremities plucked off one by one by the THHS ASB while rusty nails are shoved down his throat by high THHS ASB officials* ARRGHAGHgrrrg *gurgle die*

The World: OH NOES!!1111one! Teh THHS ASB!!

And Australia was like: WTF mate?

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THHS

See Trabuco Hills High School.

In short, Hell on Earth.

All THHS needs is a front gate built of corpses with the words carved into it: "Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here."

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