Random
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Random
That idiot that just cut you off and slowed down below the speed limit. Or any other retard that pulled their license out of a cracker jack box
That cracker jack just hit the curb and ran in to a parked car.
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Used for the professional drunk. When you drink so much and so often you function even when you are blackout drunk. You are so good at it your friends and even professional bartenders can't tell you should have been cut off 5 drinks ago. You continue to talk and walk but have no idea what you are saying or doing. This also makes for fun Sherlock holmes mornings.
Man I was on autopilot last night, where did I get this fez?
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When you wake up not sure where you are or where you've been. This usually happens after a night of drinking too much, or just enough. The first thing you deduce is where your at. The best is your own bed with a hottie. If not find your pants and try and find someone you know.
After this is done you check your cell phone to see who you called and texted. This may require apologies laterdepending on the time and what sounded good last night.
Then you start checking your surroundings, is that blood or pizza sauce all over my shirt? Why does my leg hurt when I try to stand? Where is my other shoe?
After you make sure that nothing requires medical attention its time to start calling your friends like sherlock holmes to figure out what the hell happened this morning.
I had one hell of a sherlock holmes morning, I woke up on a park bench with a dead squirrel.
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