pedagogy complex

A sexual or romantic preoccupation with the student/teacher relationship. This does not have to be literal, and does not have to be sick. It applies when one is turned on by teaching or learning from another person.

Ling is new to the States and doesn't speak English very well. I have a huge pedagogy complex, and I love teaching her English whenever we go out.

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categorical imperative

A definition with teeth.

Professors will have you study this forever. Here's what you need to know. It means what it sounds like: an imperative (commandment) that you either follow, or you'll be reclassified as immoral.

Kant had his, and many people think his was the only one, but it's not true. A categorical imperative is a definition-based morality. Even the Utilitarians use them.

What will happen if I do something immoral?

You'll have done something immoral.

Oh, it's a categorical imperative.

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country matters

old slang term for sexual relations.

I write separately only because it would be a shame to not quote Shakespeare on this one.

Hamlet: Lady, shall I lie in your lap?
Ophelia: No, my lord.
Hamlet: I mean my head upon your lap.
Ophelia: Aye, my lord.
Hamlet: Or did you think I meant country matters?
Ophelia: I think nothing, my lord.
Hamlet: That's a fair thought, to lie between maid's legs.

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yellow bicycle

Bicycles one can find in select American cities (primarily Austin, TX) that are free for your use whenever you find them. Obviously, they are yellow. You are free to take it and ride it to where you want to go, but not to store it, so that once you get to where you want to go, someone else can take it.

It was gonna be a long walk down to Mag's, but I found a yellow bicycle halfway there.

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bar

A State regulating body for lawyers that treats information like it's a controlled substance.

In most states, the bar makes it a crime just to give advice to friends without paying government extortion.

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laundry payday

When a person collects cash from his dryer immediately after doing laundry. This term has a different connotation from laundry lottery based on the reliability and frequency of the phenomenon. Laundry paydays are what people who never clean out their pockets get, every week, just like a paycheck. Like a laundry lottery, this produces momentary happiness until the person realizes that they had the money all along.

I can't go drink tonight, but tomorrow is laundry payday, so hit me up then.