cunt envy

when a man is jealous of his wife or girlfriend's relationship with his female colleagues. Usually occurs because said man is afraid that his worlds are colliding and there may be unwanted transfer of information between the females, or that in the course of their innocent conversation over a hot beverage they will end up in bed together. this causes extra confusion for the male as he is torn as to wether he actually likes this idea.

Man 1: I've got to stop my wife having coffee with my suckutary

man 2: why ?
Man 1 : I'm worried they will start discussing me and my wife will find out all my secrets!! or worse still coffee will turn into lesbian sex.
man 2: you wish don't be so ridiculous they probably just talk about face cream and washing powder , you have such a bad case of cunt envy

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don't get your fanny in a twanny

Don't get over excited about nothing , similar to don't get your knickers in a twist . Particularly used when someone is over stimulated by a piece of information or occurence . Can be used to express the girliness of a male. Don't get a boner don't get your twat in a knot

Katie : oh my god , nici what are you doing to that cucumber?
Nici: don't get your fanny in a twanny I used protection !

Jose: boo hoo I'm so sad my wife has gone on holiday for 6 weeks I'm so lonely
Ang: don't get your fanny in a twanny you big girl ! Lets go out and get some sluts

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