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Dildonic Plague

Like the plagues of history, a dildonic plague starts with a single infected person that spreads their infection to others. The symptoms consist chiefly of being driven to such distraction and stupidity in the face of easily avoidable catastophe that others who are not infected become convinced that having a violently raging dildo lodged in some hidden orifice is the only reasonable explanation, and that this "disease" is active and spreading amongst others.

This morning, our website was down because someone forgot to renew the certificate! Then the shipping department shipped my packages to the wrong address. Not an hour later, some guy clogged the toilet and flooded the bathroom by trying to flush it repeatedly. Finally, it ravaged operations, who accidentally canceled our Internet service! Someone should have taken the 10-inch vibrating mamba out of their ass before they came to work! We've got a freakin' dildonic plague on our hands!

by dirtforker February 9, 2020