bad asymptote

said when one wants to:
1. keep it PG AND
2. say bad ass(-ymptote) AND
3. appear smart

Pre-AP Algebra 2 Teacher: Today we are going to learn about asymptotes.
Class Clown: Can't we listen to some bad asymptote music instead?

Two years later...

AP Calculus Teacher: Today we are covering differentiability. Corners, cusps and breaks are not differentiable.

Student #1: What is she talking about?
Student #2: I don't know. Who cares?
Student #3: Hey, did y'all hear about the bad ass fight in the cafeteria?

Calculus Teacher: Student #3, I did hear about the bad asymptote fight, but if you want to pass the AP Calculus Test so that you don't have to take Calculus in college, I suggest we focus on the fact that corners, cusps, and breaks are not differentiable. And yes, breaks can be asymptotes or holes.

Here's a fun way to remember what a break is: A BREAK-up in a romantic relationship is usually due to a partner being an ASS-ymptote. Use your imaginations with the word HOLES...

couch hopper

a person who is down on her luck (or just doesn't like living at her permanent residence), but has so many good friends that she will never be homeless because she can sleep on a different couch every night of the month

I am a professional couch hopper; hotel rooms are for amateurs or rich folk not poor college students with lots of amazing friends.

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