brabies

A viral social disease that causes an immediate desire to reproduce. This virus is transmitted by a variety of vectors, including exposure to children's playgrounds, visits by nieces and nephews, reality television, glossy magazines, nagging parents.

Signs and symptoms: cooing, wistful staring at small hats and gloves, reading books of names, aversion to latex...

"Dude, I dodged a bullet, after we broke up the ex got a mean case of brabies and now she's knocked up."

"I'm avoiding that brabid dude, I'd prefer to be mobile for the next two years."

copercosetic

The state of things being very satisfactory or acceptable due to the effects of painkillers.
Getting along splendidly with family because you are high.

The only reason Thanksgiving was copercosetic was because I raided grandma's medicine cabinet and found her stash of oxycodones.