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When a man gets angry at a woman for faking an orgasm, he asks her to suck him off to completion. Then, rather than jizzing into her mouth, he pretends like he's cumming and unleashes a tsunami of piss into her mouth.
Dude1: Yo, did you get with Shaniqua last night?
Dude2: Ya, that bitch faked a Big O on me, so I gave her a nice taste of my golden nut.
10π 1π
The act of masturbating during a virtual meeting held via Google MeetΓΒ©.
Kyle: Oh man, I can't believe we have to have another virtual diversity training again...
Donald: Yeah but that trannysient leading it is pretty hot. I think I'll turn it into a Google Meat Beat.
When a homeless man poses as a transgender so as to trick people into letting him live with them.
Donald: Ever since you moved in, you never shave or tuck your dick between your legs anymore.
Dan: Yeah bro, I'm a trannysient, what the fuck did you expect?
An SJW who wishes to minimize their resource usage by choosing not to jizz into a napkin, but rather recycle the material by jizzing into a compost pile.
Ooooh oooooh ooooooooooooooooh, oh yeah I'm cumming into this compost pile, oh oh oh I'm such a good Social Jizztace Warrior.
3π 1π
The sperm of a black man.
Black man: I applied my caramel icing to Betty's chest on her birthday.
The act of stimulating the anus by excreting feces partially out of one's own ass, then allowing the natural pressure of the anus to suck the feces back into one's own rectum. The process is repeated to one's satisfaction.
Dude1: So I've been trying out assturdbation lately.
Dude2: Oh man, I tried that once, it didn't work for me. Too much leakage.
Dude1: Yeah man, you've got to change your diet to avoid all types of fiber.
When a dude who goes by the name of "Mike" stands in front of a chick, proceeds to secretly make his penis hard, and then secretly angles it upwards and pisses directly into her unsuspecting face and mouth.
Mike: Hey baby girl, you like Mike's Hard Lemonade?
Chick: Oh yes I do.
Mike: Okay here I'll give you some.
*Mike then blasts her in the face*
17π 9π