slutwipe

n. Brief, largely inadequate, method of bathing one’s dirty bits whilst tenting in the freezing cold wilderness miles away from soap, water, and privacy.

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Ready to hike up to that cwm Kay? The morning sun is just burning the frost off our hanging gloves.

In a mo. Just doing a bit of a slutwipe in me sleeping bag.

Right. Well I’ll just have a little dump in this recyclable bag.

Zagdawgs

n. Gawd’s gift to basketball. The anti-Dukes. The best. Ever.

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Who you think will win tonight.

The Zagdawgs. No contest. Baylor will be lucky to come second.

jaggering

v. Chaotically lunging about a stage trying to recreate the magic of the past. Done by aging singers, politicians, tycoons etc.

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Why are Trump and Biden still jaggering? Give it a rest men.

grouch potato

n. Person more interested in complaining than solving.

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My husband hates our government but he will not make the effort to vote. He is a total grouch potato.

merdog

n. Magical creature produced by the union of an adventurous puppy and a somewhat startled fish on a moonlit beach. Able to grant wishes, create rainbows, find sunken treasure and rescue drowning princesses.

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Curses! Where be my chest full of doubloons? I wager my eyes that a scurvy merdog has spirited it clean away.

trumpy

adj. Similar to grumpy but with a harrassed impolite yet imperial air.

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The prince is looking trumpy this morning. Did someone overcook his eggs?

cuppies

n. Endearment referencing sweet, sweet cupcakes.

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J’s cuppies are only the best foodstuffs ever made! And they cure puppy homelessness too.

Magic cuppies!