transslendered

adj. Possessing a body image out of keeping with one’s measured BMI.

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My chubby friend insists on being called “thin”. Says he’s come out as transslendered and for the first time feels happy and empowered.

poopocalypse

n. Catastrophic spillage of feces. Often involves splatters on walls and ceilings during diaper changes and results in liberal swearing, heavy drinking, vows of celibacy etc.

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Go to sleep Delano. Mommy is going to drink wine until she forgets your latest poopocalypse.

punkle

n. A troubling or criminal situation one finds oneself in. Usually the fault of a misguided society and not due to a personal fault.

How do you plan to extricate yourself from this here punkle mate?

Plans are for losers.

Plans are for those who do not have both hands caught in the cookie jar that is life.

hanksian

adj. Totally excellent. Being a super-celebrity in ways no other celebrity can even think of. Often used sarcastically.

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Bono is really supporting great causes and keeping it real. But he will never be hanksian.

dumple

n. Small pile of excretement. A term used exclusively by small children and rich urbanites with tiny dogs.

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What a cute dumple! Who's mummy's little precious?

Mother! I'm in law school. Let it go.

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peachy

adj. Atmosphere or circumstances conducive to impeachment.

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Things in Washington are looking peachy.

parking

v. Hiking through a variety of tough but beautiful National Parks in succession without bathing. A brief slut wipe now and again is, of course, acceptable.

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Kayley and I and her fiancee were engaged in some very hot parking last week.

Do tell. Did you happen to take any photos?

Hundreds!