Shitsturbation

A simultaneous performance of shitting and masturbating, often done in public restrooms.

Kayla: Wow, I heard some really weird noises when I was using the restroom. Sounded like someone was really enjoying their dump...
Michael: They were probably undergoing Shitsturbation. It's like a self-performed blumpkin with your hands.

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Surf and Turf

A simultaneous fingering of the vagina and eating out of the clit. The surf represents the wet part (the tongue) while the turf represents the dry (the finger).

Billy: Dude, Britney was really moaning last night. Did you get it in?

Kyle: Nah, I just surf and turfed her.

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