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launch the octopus

This is when a child, surrounded by sea-faring men, is thrown into a pool.

The child is then rapidly chased around the vicinity, and then violently violated.

Mustard must be involved at some point.

The winner is then crowned.

All rejoice.

***Also, there are many key stipulations to the execution of a formal 'launch the octopus.' They are as follows: the child must not be an actual child but an inanimate stuffed animal so that this is not a morally-reprehensible activity; 'sea-faring men' included but are not limited to men, women, folks of all genders working in piracy, fishing, surfing, sailing, or internet architecture only; the crown must be a Burger King crown; the water in the pool must be mostly Kool-aid; everyone has a fun time; it is a wild ritual of lust, dust, gust, mustard, and whimsy; no muppets may be involved.

Yo, did you see those seabros 'launch the octopus' yesterday before the Penguins vs. Blumpkins game?!?! Ahhhhhhhhh! It was supa dupa cray, bae!

by googoodoodoo May 23, 2019