early adopter

A person who is typically the first to purchase new technologies before they become popular in an effort to look interesting. They can be easily identified by the dozens of boxes in their basement filled with crap like Nook Ereaders, Zune mp3 players, Google Glasses and AOL email addresses as well as their remarkably small retirement savings accounts.

Our tech startup is failing because we only hired early adopters with attention spans similar to goldfish.