Idiot Passenger Syndrome

The phenomenon whereby the journey of a whole group is spoiled by the thoughtlessness of one individual.

Behaviours include but are not limited to - excessive and indiscriminate MP3 player use. Standing in a carriage doorway and not stepping off or moving aside. Barging onto a carriage as others are exiting. Stopping dead at the bottom of an escalator. Carrying extraordinary amounts of luggage in peak periods. Travelling in huge rustling packs, their vile neon coloured cagoules shedding static like a thunderstorm. Throwing themselves in front of trains in peak time. Bastards the lot of them.

Sufferers of IPS can be encountered on any mass transit system but the London Underground (see Hell) is particularly prone to the depradations of IPS sufferers.

"...and then this complete Idiot Passenger Syndrome got on and stood right in the doorway for two stops. I think he was listening to Craig David. What a wanker. I had to hit him in the balls with my bag just to make him move out of the way."

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trainsurfing

The act of riding the exterior of a railway carriage. The only upside of this activity is the high likelihood of the surfer being squished, thus removing himself from the genepool.

"Another kid died trainsurfing."
"It's just natural selection in action."

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twinstinct

the unspoken sympatico shared by twins - most especially those moments where they appear to have an almost telephathic understanding of each other.

(playing charades)
twin 1: film, book - five words...
twin 2: (cuts in) the unbearable lightness of being.
other players: foul! twinstinct!
(as overheard on a recent rail journey)

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raidwipe

of, or pertaining to, the successful conclusion of a raid inside World of Warcraft.

Further qualification would be appreciated.

"...when you raidwipe by drawing aggro from the MT with DOTs."

As seen on Penny Arcade 21.07.2008

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ten minute rule

The amount of time a DVD supplied by a through-the-post rental service has to prove itself watchable. A way of dealing with the inevitable question; "Who the hell picked that!?" when some discs arrive. A damage limitation excercise. Life is too short for bad movies.

Shyamalan's The Happening dropped through the door in the morning so we thought what the hell. We used the ten minute rule. It didn't make it.

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strap monkey

train or subway commuter; usually used in a pejorative sense.

Just look at the blank faces on the strap monkeys. Poor swine condemned to suffer the indignities of London Underground day after day...

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parade wave

Oscillation of the hand from the wrist with minimal input from the elbow or shoulder. Popularised by the British Royal Family.

Often to be seen from the back of landaus and throught the glass of armoured limousines as royals waft past.

Unpopular with American presidents who seem to prefer a more grandstanding straight up from the shoulder type vigorous waggling of the whole arm. But then, they only have to do it for 8 years, not a lifetime.

There goes the Queen Mum, giving the crowd her elegant little parade wave.

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