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A towel used to soak up your jizz once you get turned on by something extremly sexy like blood on the dance floor or oldmen walking their tiny dogs while riding their scooters. A portable version of a jizz towel is the new and improved handy jizz rag.
Example one: "jarrod matthew is so amazing and his eyes are so yummy, I luvers him"
"jeez dude, get your fucking jizz towel ready"
Example two: -riding in the car- "HOLYWALNUTS! did you just see that bilboard with Morgan Freemen?!"
"dude... I got this handy portable jizz rag for you to use"
46👍 24👎
A yellow ruite 66 limited PT cruiser with hippy stickers and a shroom sticker (that still needs to be put on) with a cock humping a shark hanging of the rear view window. Sex on Wheels has it's downsides though; they usually end up being cursed and accident probed due to people staring deeply at it's sexiness.
kid: your mom can take us to mcdonalds tonight right?
me: yeah but it might not be safe, people are always staring at her sex on wheels
4👍 28👎
Moms in their late fourties who listen to eminem with young children in the car..
Mom: MY MOM LIKE VALLIUM AND LOTS OF DRUGS!
Kid: Seriously, Mom?...your such a meminem
1👍 4👎
A phrase moms use to wake up their kids for pointless things in the morning.
mommy: DAY LIGHT IN THE SWAMP
kid: Damn, It's like 7:30 am and she's waking me up to see a therapist
15👍 8👎