Phantom Feature

A useful and expected feature that is mysteriously lacking in a similar or competing product.

Expecting said feature to be present and then being unpleasantly surprised by its absence.

Using a device with the expectation that said features will be present.

Technical analogue to phantom limb

After years of Firefox and Chrome, I can't bear to use IE for all the phantom features

Diamond Snuggler

Someone who creates the pretense of intimacy for the sake of being purchased things without it directly being prostitution. A gold digger.

She strung him along until he had bought her enough jewelery then was gone without a word; a total diamond snuggler.

hipster mouth

The condition where one has burned the roof of one's mouth by attempting to eat an item of food that has not yet cooled to a reasonable temperature for consumption, i.e. "before it was cool".

"I was so hungry I ate the pizza straight out of the oven and had a bad case of hipster mouth for the next day."

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