hollister

a lame store for posers that, like abercrombie, smells like vomit (hollister cologne), employs social rejects with nice hair and faux tans, and sells fake vintage clothes with made-up events on them. except worse because when you're in there it feels like you're in a cave.

"jesus since when is there a cave attached to the mall?"
"no this is just hollister"
"i can't see my hand"
"let's leave."

"did you really go to the 1982 pie eating contest of salmonville, west virginia?"
"no, i wish. so instead i got this shirt at hollister."

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