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Gentle crush

An action used to immobilize and/or exterminate insects without overtly damaging the specimen (and thus making examination difficult) or causing the internal contents of the specimen to adhere the aforementioned specimen to the crushing implement, thus contaminating it from future use. The crushing implement (typically a shoe, flat rock, paper, or otherwise suitable object) is placed over the specimen and advanced until a controlled breaking of the exoskeleton is both felt and possibly heard; the practice has frequently been described as "satisfying". The crushing implement is then released and inspection may begin. This method can be applied to slow moving insects, but may require a previously applied 'stunning' blow to fast moving or flying insects.

Dude 1 to Dude 2: "Look at the size of that Fu**ing _____! Gentle Crush!!"
Dude 1's shoe: "...ccccrrrkkcc..."
Dude 2 to Dude 1: "It's guts shot out of its anus and glued it to the driveway, three of its legs came off, and its remaining limbs are twitching uncontrollably; but it's still in pretty good condition! Check out it's weird spiny/barbed/colorful/long/fat appendage(s)!

by idontreallywantapseudonym17463 April 2, 2013