There once was a boy named Julian OâToole
Who wanted to be the most fly kid in school
Though he had lots of friends, and they liked him a lot
He wanted to be at the totem-pole top
So he pictured those boys in the social elite
And wondered aloud, âBut what makes them so neat?
Iâm smarter than they, and I think that Iâm hot,
So what do they have that I havenât got?â
Julian imagined them all: Micky D and Brad J,
And their cheerleader girlfriends named Sue and Renee
And of course there was Doug, and his fuck-buddy Peg
âBut Iâve got it!â He cried. âThey all hu on the reg!â
Now âhu on the regâ â just what does that mean?
Is it something you do? Is it something obscene?
It can mean many things, like making out on a date,
Or meeting each Thursday to go fornicate
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