High Presbyterian

A rare breed of dog that generally rejects any concept of gender. It is distinguished by its small stature, usually brown in colour and very active. It sets itself apart from other breeds by its propensity to try and mate with small stuffed animals, regardless of any external assignment of gender.

In the 1990s the breed was often called a ‘Stoned Britany Spears,’ since Presbyterian is an anagram for ‘Britney Spears.’ That practice has declined along with Miss Spears cultural relevance and will likely follow her into her rightful place in the realm of obscurity.

My friend’s dog is what’s known as a ‘High Presbyterian’ ‘Abby,’ has a toy they call a ‘fuck dragon,’ although physically female, the dog is constantly trying to mate with small stuffed dragons.