gak

Similar to the slang word "cum" in that it functions as both a verb and a noun by describing both ejaculation and semen, respectively.

As a noun, it is inspired by the archaic Nickelodeon product, Gak. Thus its use is preferable if the load of semen is of a thicker consistency. On the other hand, if the load is of a watery, drippy consistency, then "squirt" is probably a better word.

As a verb, "gak" is obscure, which makes it handy for formal situations in which "bust a nut, cum, cream my jeans, blow my load," etc. would be considered socially unacceptable.

Rhymes with "clack," which is a slang word for carnal, aggressive, "balls-slapping-ass" sex. Thus, to "clack 'n gak" would be to suggest a "down and dirty" coital session in which the male only concerns himself with his own pleasure and ultimately, his ejaculation.

"I gakked in her hair once, and since I felt so badly I bought her some Gak."

"Oh God...I'm about to gak!"

"There's still gak all over your earlobe."

"A quick clack n' gak, and then I was out of there."

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clack

Most commonly used to describe aggressive, carnal sex which harkens to the exaggerated "ass-clap" sounds of mainstream pornography. Commonly accompanied with obnoxiously loud clapping of the hands for effect.

Its long form, "clack-a-lack," may also be used for special emphasis.

Rhymes with "gak," which, besides being an archaic Nickelodeon product, is a slang word for semen and/or ejaculating. Thus, to say "clack 'n gak" would be to suggest a "down and dirty" coital session in which the male only concerns himself with his own ejaculation and subsequent bragging rights.

May also be used to suggest any contact between two hard surfaces, usually instigated in an aggressive fashion.

Women (or men on the receiving end) may find the term "clack" offensive, as they are often referred as the pronoun "it" or "that" rather than named outright.

Thus,

"Dude, did you clack that shit?"
"Hell yeah I clacked it!"

Sounds much better than:

"Dude, did you clack her?"
"Hell yeah I clacked her!"

If the subject must be named in the sentence, then the pronoun "it" is still included and precedes the subject:

"Oh man, I'd love to clack it with the Olson twins."

Examples of non-sexual uses:

"Somebody tell this guy to scram before he gets clacked in the jaw."

"Damn, he clacked it out of the park!"

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crayhem

A situation that is both cray and total mayhem

It was crayhem at the sorority house last night when Matthew McConaughey made a surprise visit.