B.F.T.D.S.

Short for Big Fat Tub-a-lard Disease Syndrome. It refers to the inescapable condition that many people face when reaching their 20s where they let themselves go and double or even triple in size.

Dude, I just saw Melissa for the first time since high school and she caught a major case of B.F.T.D.S. She weighs like 3 bills now!

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Share the welf

Short for Share the Welf(are).

Term that describes when one buys food for all his friends using his government-paid Food Stamp Card.

Chad was running out of days to use up the money on his food stamp card, so luckily for me he was willing to share the welf.

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shlonky

A born loser. The word originates from and is comprised of the two words 'Shlong' and 'Donkey'.

Look at that shlonky wearing a button-down dress shirt with sweatpants.

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browner pastures

A place less desirable than your current location. The opposite of greener pastures.

I can't believe Fred left this amazing city for browner pastures.

juggermankles

A she-man with broad shoulders, popeye forearms, and veins sticking out of her 25" ankles... not the ideal body type for a woman.

We have a juggermankles in the office here, I'm thinking of recruiting her for the football team.

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let the dogs out

To party with no inhibitions; i.e. unleash the beast. The phrase was originally made popular by the worst song of all time, "who let the dogs out?", but now is used mockingly.

Since the world is supposedly going to end tomorrow, I am going to let the dogs out tonight.

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do the thing

The new proper way of saying "do it".

"Want to go to the mall?" "Yeah, let's do the thing"

"That idling car is just beggin to be stolen, I need to hurry up and do the thing before the owner comes back out"

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