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The masturbation used right before having sex. Used to ensure that a cock-slap does not occur. As made famous by The Inbetweeners.
Simon: What if I can't get it up?
Jay: Nah, don't worry, nip off and have a tactical wank now
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A text sent that is part of a conversation that is unwanted; a conversation stopping text.
Linda: How are you? Wanna go out tonight?
Joe: I'm good.
Later
Mark; Dude, aren't you going out with Linda?
Joe: Nah, I sent her a Non-progressive text.
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Noun;
The act of leaving the last three crisps, the last doughnut, the last five mililitres of beer, simply to avoid putting the packet in the bin
Joe: Aww man these crisps have green mold on them!
Tom: Yeah I know dude, you've been empty packet squatting for like 2 weeks!
A prank where the unsuspecting victim is shown a photo of an object they are holding/eating being defaced. Comes fron How I Met Your Mother
Person 1: OMFG you did what to my sandwich?!
Person 2: Dude its a stinson photo prank