cable and chill

When your boyfriend wants to netflix and chill but he's broke and can't afford netflix, so you have to use cable

Guy: Hey baby, you wanna come netflix and chill later?

Girl: Get away from me with your broke ass. Everybody knows you poor Jerrod and can't afford netflix, so you have to cable and chill.

8👍 5👎

holy ghosting

When your spirit leaves your body as a ghost and has sex with a virgin girl in her sleep, then informs her the next day that she is pregnant with your son.

Virgin Girl: Oh my god, I missed my period!!
*Ghost randomly appears*
Ghost: What did you think about that ghost dick last night? I was holy ghosting the other night and you were the lucky one! Enjoy our son.

7👍 6👎

butthole shielding

When you squeeze your asscheeks together to protect your butthole. A person who executes this act is likely doing it for one of two reasons:

1) To hold in a turd when you really have to take a shit
2) Protect yourself from butt rape

Person 1: Why is Carly walking so funny? I bet she had anal for the first time last night and her asshole hurts! WHORE!
Person 2: It looks like she is actually butthole shielding. I bet she has diarrhea.