web 2.0 haircut

A shaved head with a goatee or van dyke, often accessorized with thick-framed glasses, or the person sporting such a look. Implies a certain degree of poseurism or gentle mocking. Derived from the unusual prevalence of this look among new media types and those who style themselves to be new media types. The original web 2.0 haircut was probably worn by Seth Godin, although he never followed through with the beard.

"We wanted to hire an SEO firm, but we ended up with some guy with a web 2.0 haircut."

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whiterboarding

A torturous meeting.

I just got a two-hour whiterboarding session from the executive team.

dashboardarrhea

Dashboardarrhea afflicts marketers and MBAs, causing them to add numerous and redundant statistics, charts and metrics to allegedly "high-level" management dashboards.

Four pages of weekly line charts? Sounds like a bad case of dashboardarrhea.

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Oily Perez

Grabbing a Foursquare mayorship by checking in to a business when it's closed.

I was mayor of the bakery until last weekend, then Frank pulled an Oily Perez and stole it from me.

fauxcast

Fauxcasting is the practice (some would say the art) of creating a revenue or sales forecast to meet some predefined number, rather than actually building it up from assumptions on the market or marketing plan. A fauxcast differs from a forecast in that it attempts to create the future rather than predict it.

Well, engineering missed the ship date, so we're going to have to spend all day updating the sales fauxcast to make the goal without new features.

SOLTERN

A person who plays a knowingly fake scrabble word for a bingo; a despicable person of low moral character. Also applies to the spurious bingo word itself.

Don't be such a SOLTERN, you know as well as I do that Olestra is a brand name.