Hot Bench

Shitting your pants while seated. Often as the result of an urgent need to defecate but not heeding the seriousness of your body's cry, thinking you can hold it or reluctancy to use public facilities.

Ate some bad Mexican food last night and wound up sitting on the Hot Bench in class this afternoon!

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The Carbonaro Effect

The ability to be easily persuaded that something is real or true due to complete lack of intelligence common sense, or judgment.

The tendency of jackass humans, particularly middle America, to accept and/or believe any old bullshit because they’re just plain stupid.
Also see: naive, gullible and credulous

Joe was overcome by The Carbonaro Effect when he bought an oceanfront timeshare in Arizona.

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