Bryan

A Bryan would probably hate crime you if given the chance. He has no sense of humor and thinks he’s funny, but it’s the complete opposite. Bryan’s need to stop spiking their hair up, it looks dumb.

That guy is such a Bryan! I think that Bryan is moving later this month!!

Michael

Actually the worst person I’ve ever met. He’s a terrible person who would probably spit in your food and give you herpes because he preys on the entire world’s downfall. He doesn’t know what to do all day so he’s having a midlife crisis at the ripe old age of 15. Please stay away from him or else he will probably spike your drink and sell you bodily extensions on the black market for 5 bucks because he is broke as hell in the financial and girl department.

Arnav: Bro have you seen Michael?
Bryan: Nope, but I can smell his stench from a 20 mile radius
Mason: Yeah, Michael is so stinky I bet when Japan got bombed, Michael probably farted and killed everyone with his radioactive methane.