jasper, tennessee

A tiny, slow town with 3 traffic lights, all on the same stretch of highway that runs through the town. A place where businesses don't have websites on that newfangled interweb thing, but both religions (Baptist and Methodist) are equally represented on every jury, board, and government office. Only redeeming quality is its proximity to Chattanooga, where one can experience civilization any time he or she is willing to drive 25 minutes down the interstate.

I ran out of shampoo and was about to go to Walmart for more, but then I remembered that I live in Jasper, Tennessee, which isn't even big enough for the Waltons to notice it's existence.