Random
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Random
When your wiping yourself and your thumb accidentally breaks through the toilet paper and gets "dirty".
Dude! I dropped the kids off at the pool last night and got covered in thumb butter when I was wiping with that cheap paper my wife buys!
Awww man that is the worse!
74π 24π
When you have been sitting so long that blood has temporarily stopped flowing to your penis and it gets numb.
HOLY SCHNIIIKIES! I can't feel my hammer!
Dude, it's OK, you've just got Numb Hammer...
Oh OK... :)
61π 2π
A dark turd that is so long it curls up above the water and back down like a long rams horn.
Dude your not going to believe the Dark Matterhorn I laid last night!
What? Niiice! You dog! Who was it some european chick you picked up?
No you dolt!! It was a huge horn like turd I laid in the poop pot!
What? No way?! Dude, next time take a picture!!
36π 19π
When you ball up your toilet paper to wipe, leave a long tail at the end (3' or 4' long). So when you wipe and flush the tail will drag along and magically disappear into the bowl.
Dude I performed the magical speckled toilet snake trick for my wife last night!
You what?!?
Dude it's the best.. just leave 3 or 4 feet of extra paper hanging off the ball you wipe with. Then simply drop it in the bowl, flush and Ta Daaa! watch that tail slither across the floor and disappear!
Dude your a Goddamn genius!
Thanks :)
49π 4π
Abnormally large breasts
Holy mother of pearl! did you see the Hella Juggs on that hose beast!?
77π 8π
When you take a giant dump and it's so big that the log sticks up out of the water like a chocolate periscope.
Dude come here I wanna show you my chocolate periscope!
What? Nooo Dude I'm not into men!
No you dork its in the toilet, check it out...
Duuuude that's awesome!!
34π 2π
What you call a woman with Hella Juggs
Yo! Check out Jugglina over there!! She's got some Hella Juggs on her ahhh!?!?!
85π 17π