Coffin body

When you get so baked so can't move at all, you may have to lay on the floor.

Can you make me a cup of tea?
No I can't move, I have coffin body.

Astronaut leg

When you get so baked that your legs won't move. They feel like an astronaut's leg.

"Can you make me a cup of tea?"
"No, I have really bad astronaut leg."