doody hairs

Traces of fecal matter left on anus follicles following a subject's successful excretion. Diarrhea can intensify, as liquid bowel movements infiltrate anus follicles at a higher rate. Also, not properly cleaning the rectal area following excretion can intensify. Can produce many symptoms including strong/pungent odor, extreme itchiness and rashes. When accompanied by toilet paper morsels and anus perspiration, an exotic human anomaly called dingle-berries can transpire.

After a night of heavy drinking Armando stopped by the local Taco Bell and consumed 6 bean burritos; later that night Armando, still intoxicated, excreted a very loose stool and fell asleep on the toilet. The next morning his anus itched quite intensely and it soon became clear he did not properly wipe and was rocking some serious doody hairs.

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douche smacker

Total moron; The type of person who comes across as both extremely corny while flat out idiotic.

Jerome approached a female half his age at the mall and said "Hey Wifey, I want to make beautiful music with you." An onlooker shook his head in disbelief and disgust and said tos his friend, "What a douche smacker."