Shootin for the Sudan

def. A euphemism used to explain to someone that the task they wish to accomplish is substantially more difficult than they had originally thought.

Origin: In the popular movie "White Men Can't Jump," Billy Hoyle (Woody Harrelson) has squandored his earnings from basketball hustling, and needs a favor from a security guard friend (Zeke, played by Kevin Benton) of his hustling partner Sydney Deane (Wesley Snipes). Zeke can help Billy's girlfriend Gloria (Rosie Perez) to get onto Jeopardy, but he isn't going to make it easy for Billy, who has to make a basket in order to get the favor. As Billy lines up to shoot on the court, Zeke points to the backboard painted to represent the flag of an African country and says,

"No, no, no, no, Billy boy, this is Ghana. You my friend, are shooting for the Sudan" as he points to the backboard at the opposite end of the court.

"And a hook shot."

Man1: "And then, I'll drop off Christine at 9pm, go home, change cars, and pick up Kelly at 9:30 to go to the club! I won't even get out of the car, Christine'll never know!"

Man2: "That's never going to work, they're ROOMMATES, man. You're shootin' for the Sudan."

29👍 15👎

samophlange

Origin: In the mid 90s, a set of outtakes from the voiceover recording sessions of the popular 80s cartoon Thundercats appeared on the Internet.

Among the very humorous moments in the outtakes is one where the voice actor for Panthro, (the, uh, "soulful" Thundercat) says the following line, "And keep your foot off that blasted Samophlange!" followed quickly by the outtake, "What the F*ck is a Samophlange?!"

Since then, Samophlange has come to be defined as any piece of sensitive technical equipment that may or may not actually exist.

While it is sometimes used in exasperation when a technical glitch can't be explained even by experts, it is more likely to be used as a geeky inside joke at the expense of a newbie, of the same ilk as the ID10T or PEBKAC "errors."

But however you use it, just don't step on it.

<Computer Newbie> "I think my CD-ROM is dead..."

<Smarmy Geek> *sigh* "I sure hope you didn't touch the Samophlange or something.."

323👍 28👎

Neurokinetics

n. A term used to describe one's ability to translate mentally projected instructions into manifested agility and coordination via an avatar in a virtual world.

Slang use: Describes the skills of someone who's way too good at video games; especially games that require meticulous detail and insane reaction times at breakneck speeds, such as Japanese shooters, complex fighting games, and Guitar Hero on Expert.

The term was popularized by the character Mouse in the movie "The Matrix" when describing Neo's preternatural speed, agility and reaction times during his kung-fu duel with Morpheus, despite having just learned how to use the interface of the construct program and the Matrix hacking software.

"Jesus Christ, he's fast. Take a look at his Neurokinetics, they're way above normal!"

"Dude, there's no way he got 100% on Expert; that's impossible." "I know, his Neurokinetics are off the chart."

24👍 3👎

Square Table Meeting

n. A gathering of men with the intention of participating in manly activities accompanied by the consumption of the fermented-grain beverage known commonly as beer.

This is fundamentally the Male equivalent of a "Girl's Night," except that instead of watching Sex and the City DVDs, swooning over Orlando Bloom, and eating Haagen Daaz; A Square Table Meeting is typically comprised of watching a classic 80s-90s Action movie (such as Die Hard) and/or an MMA or boxing event, eating some form of grilled meat or fried cheese product, and having a tournament of some kind. Hold em Poker is most common, Beer Pong and Beirut are also typical; as are impromptu Burping and Farting contests.

The Square Table Meeting has its origins in the popular series of Miller Lite commercials where a quorum of men's men concoct, (and an ancient man known only as "The Scribe" records,) decrees governing manly behavior, which are appropriately dubbed, "Man Laws."

Some of the more famous Men of the Square Table include Jerome Bettis, formerly of the Pittsburg Steelers, actors Burt Reynolds and Eddie Griffin, wrestler Triple H, and that dude who cut off his own arm when it was trapped under a boulder.

"Yo man, UFC 60 is this weekend, is anyone going to order that on pay-per-view?"

"Hell yeah, we're having a Square Table Meeting at RJ's! Grill goes hot at 6, we're watching Predator at 7:30, UFC event starts at 10."

13👍 2👎

cockspeak

def. A humorous muffled dialect of a given language; rendered almost unintelligible by the fact that the one speaking (usually female) has a cock in their mouth.

Cockspeak should not be confused with "Dentistic," which is a similar sounding dialect, but is instead caused by the presence of dental instruments, novacaine injections, and a saliva vacuum.

Cockspeak in Action:

Man: "Uuhh.. god.. yeah.."

Woman: "Reeoo liyck nat?"

Man: "Damn.. that's so good..."

Woman: "Wyah, rye noose ty nung an nick ith tall naroun..."

31👍 8👎

The Tap Rule

The one prevailing law during a gangbang that creates order from disorder. After a reasonable period of time has passed, the gentleman who's "on deck" may tap the shoulder of the gentleman currently "at bat," and the latter gentleman must step aside and let the next guy have his turn.

This rule also works for drinking at a water fountain.

The Tap Rule was popularized during one particular scene (I believe it was No Holes Barred 4) where a certain anonymous man repeatedly ignored the aforementioned shoulder tap and was sternly reminded by one the men standing by to, "Respect the Tap Rule."

Rather than let the normally enjoyable experience turn to violent anarchy, the man relented and allowed the next gentleman to put his hoohoodilly in the female participant's cha-cha or whoopsidaisy, thereby preventing possible bloodshed.

19👍 5👎

Pride

A feeling of pleasure associated with admirable possessions

The man had great pride for his Hungarian Nuts.

9👍 13👎