oh shit son

something an idiot says when surprised

micah,when i leap at him with a knife:"oh shit son!"

20👍 130👎

fatwich

a type of sandwich consisting of such ingredients as cheese,bacon,avocado,more cheese,tuna salad and bread that is ultimately fried in butter, much like a grilled cheese, but with octuple the calories

bret: "jen...? will you make me a fatwich?"

4👍 3👎

church

1:where you tell your parents your going to be for the next few hours, when in reality,youll be at your boyfriends house,fucking him

"hey mom? im going to church in an hour. have you seen my red dress? the one with the slit up the side?

61👍 76👎

wonkavator

willy wonkas "elevator" that can go not just up and down, but it can go sideways and slantways and front ways and squareways...you get the picture

charlie: "its an elevator."
willy: "uh, no. its a wonkavator"

45👍 15👎