Couch

(Possibly older urban slang) It’s what you put on top of a scoop of ice cream or a sundae, indiscernible from what can be found from reaching under the cushions of a couch, scooping up what you can, and sprinkling it on top of said frozen treat.

Girl let’s go to the Tasty Freeze...I want me a BIG ASS bowl of soft serve chocolate with couch.

Ann Coulter

The combined mucosal/fecal secretion that usually accompanies a bad case of hemorrhoids. The presence of Ann Coulter is usually preceded by insatiable itching and anal sphincter tissue inflamation. The presence of Ann Coulter should not be confused with the presence of Santorum although both terms could be easily interchangeable in casual conversation.

"Oh shit (literally), my hemorrhoids are so bad right now that I'm feeling that unclean feeling of Ann Coulter. Got any baby wipes on ya?"

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