Football bat

When something is totally supery-dupery gay, you can say that it's "as queer as a football bat." Because you don't use a bat in football. See also, tennis helmet.

I'm thinking of switching to FaceBook 'cuz MicePace is getting gayer than a football bat.

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Tennis helmet

When something is, like, incredibly gay, you can say that it's "as queer as a tennis helmet." Because they don't make tennis helmets. See also, football bat.

Your MicePace page is as queer as a tennis helmet. Change it, dude.

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