Cortez

A small town in SW Colorado, where there is nothing to do but drag main and go to Wal-Mart. Also known as home to tweekers, teenage mothers, and the scattered ashes of broken dreams. Filled with trailer parks, rednecks, and methamphetamines, Cortez is a white trash paradise!

Billy - "Wow Ted, I saw like, 10 people I knew at Wal-Mart today!"
Ted - "This is Cortez, Billy. Whaddya expect?"

Molly - "I was gonna go to college and become a doctor, but I started tweaking and dropped out of school when I got pregnant at sixteen."
Sadie Jo - "You sound just like everyone else in Cortez."

158👍 146👎

War

When two or more parties get pissed off at one another and decide to start blowing shit up. Parties in question are usually insane assholes who don't give a shit about the well-being of others and think it's perfectly okay to bomb innocent people and ruin the lives of others. Basically, a large-scale temper-tantrum.

Insane Asshole 1 -- Waaaaahhhhh, you took my land!

Insane Asshole 2 -- Waaaahhhh, you took MY land!

Me -- Can't you fuckers learn to share?

Insane Assholes 1 & 2 -- NO!!!! (Proceed to start blowing shit up for no good reason)

Me -- (Running for cover) Stupid fucking war!

14👍 13👎