cigarette

The reason why your friends and family lost some respect for you. Also the reason why your teeth and spit are yellow and black and your dick is going limp after a few minutes of sex.

guy - *lights a cigarette in the elevator*
old woman - *cough* ahem
guy - lady i apparently don't care about my own health, what makes you think i'll give a shit about yours?

226👍 203👎

Chris

1. Someone who has the tendency to forget where they placed the most practical and mundane belongings.
2. One who loses things easily.

"Dude, Chris left his wallet at my house AGAIN"

"lol, such a chris thing to do"

324👍 378👎

gathered

the most lame and pointless alternative to saying "figured"

christine: you have a friend that goes here?
matt: yeah, she's in the same grade as me
christine: gathered.
matt:... wtf?
christine: gathered! like figured...
matt: wha - who the hell says that??

56👍 55👎

59

An attempted 69 by person in a wheelchair

Sarah: -Sees handicapped guy- "That guy's cute"

Alex: "Lawl, you gonna 59 each other?"

81👍 148👎

Master Chief

1)A very quiet character who single-handedly committed ridiculous genocide to an intelligent alien race, while never saying more than a few words.
2)Your typical mass murderer.

hello I am master chief lolololoololololololllollolololol

do u even care that you decimated thousands of grunts, jackels, elites, and hunters who were all brainwashed from the dogmatic "prophets?"

NAHZ

625👍 217👎