Sandy

1. A barely-a-hurricane that would not have been big news had it hit Florida or the Carolinas.

2. A squirrel who can live underwater.

1. We get a Sandy every other year down here, New York, quit crying!

2. Sandy left the ocean to visit Texas.

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Greensboro

Third largest city in North Carolina, largest in Piedmont Triad region. It is home to Lorillard Tobacco, which makes Newport and Maverick cigarettes among others. Has really nice and really cruddy areas, and Wendover Avenue ain't no fun. Good bars and restaurants, shopping, has a water park, museums (ie Civil Rights Museum), an indoor shooting range near Market St/Friendly Ave, and an outdoor shooting range anywhere on South Elm-Eugene Street or Randelman Rd at night.

Passerby: Why are you always smoking Newport menthols?
Me: I'm helping out Greensboro's economy!

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