Campaign Tail

Getting laid soley based on one's own political beliefs and allegiances. These beliefs may be actual or situational, preferably the latter.

I'm tired of all these bullshit partisan politics bro.

You've got that right man, but what can we do to unite this great country of ours?

I'll tell you what, guys and girls on both side of the aisle can agree on one thing...it's time to hit the Campaign Tail!

A.S.S

Acronym, meaning: Always Stay Strapped. A way of living. A great way of living.

Bro, I was out in the woods and a fucking bear came up on me.

Oh Shit! What did you do?

I shot that mother fucker bro.

Damn dude, good thing you A.S.S.

6👍 8👎

Loaf Poaching

1. The act of taking a dump into a pot of boiling water.

2. The act of busting down the door and shooting someone in the chest with an elephant gun dressed as Hunter van Pelt from Jumanji, while they are taking a dump, and stealing their shit.

1. Bro, I was camping last weekend and after I was done cooking the beans, I took the leftover water and took a dump in it.

Dude, yes, I love Loaf Poaching

2. Ricky is in the bathroom right now, I want to play a prank on him, what should I do.

You should absolutely poach his loaf man.

60👍 5👎

Musket Ball

A massive ball of resin pulled from a marijuana pipe, rolled into a ball and smoked.

Dude, Charlie hadn't cleaned his bowl in like 6 months, dude pulled like 3 musket balls out.

75👍 9👎

Little Leaguer

Coach a little league team to the city title, take them out to pizza to celebrate, have them come back to your house for ice cream, kill them, have sex with them and bury them in the walls of your basement.

Hey man where's Rick been, I haven't seen him in months.

Dude, he got sent to jail bro, got busted pulling a little leaguer.

69👍 31👎

Front Nine

Your face, or personal space close to you.

I was skating in front of the bank and that fat security guard came up and got in my face.

I hate that fat fuck, what'd you do?

I told him to back off and get outta my front nine or I'd have to whoop his ass.

52👍 9👎

Panama Jack

Receiving a hand job, with the aid of Panama Jack tanning oil as a lubricant.

Bro, me and Tina were at the beach yesterday, it was basically a dead scene, I had a couple beers and she hooked me up with a Panama Jack.

17👍 7👎