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atascadero

city in San Luis Obispo County, CA where the police have nothing to do but break up high school parties, write parking tickets at the local high school, and call for backup on routine traffic stops. There is an average of 1 homicide per year, 87% of which occur at Motel 6 on the corner of Santa Rosa & El Camino Real.
There once was a bowling alley but the man shut her down a few years back.
Stuck with nothing to do, young people often drink in excess and use recreational drugs, primarily marijuana, but recent studies show an influx of harcore shit.
Adults of Atascadero fall into three categories: meth freaks, soccer moms, and normies. Meth freaks frequent local attractions such as Spencer's Market, Chalk Mountain Liquor, and the Paloma Creek Drive-Thru Market. And they do meth. Soccer moms and their husbands often drive excessively large vehicles and hog the road, so as to assure normies and teenagers not drive at reasonable speeds. Normies are a diverse group of people that do not fall into either of the previous two categories.
Atascadero's economy can be divided into two main groups: Kelly Gearhart and El Camino Real. Kelly Gearhart is a local crook that dominates large-scale housing development in the greater northern San Luis Obispo County. Due to the recent housing market crash combined with Gearhart's constant irresponsible reinvesting, he is bankrupt and all the banks ever are hitting him up for millions. El Camino Real is the main drag in Atascadero, upon which 95% of businesses are located. The main issue with El Camino Real is its length. It runs the entire length of the town, approximately 7 miles, so shopping on foot is not an option. Hopes of a downtown area were crushed in the 50's when some really smart people decided the freeway should go right through the middle of town (wtf is wrong with the riverbed?). Some claim the area around the intersection of Traffic Way & El Camino Real as a promising downtown scene, but experts suggest suck it easy.

There's nothing to do, let's get drunk/high because we live in Atascadero.

Let's go shopping anywhere else because Atascadero doesn't have any shopping.

by sb47 September 16, 2008

97👍 40👎