Shabated

When you’re taking a shit and you decide to masturbate. Or in the process of masturbating you end up shitting. See also defabating.

I was so horny when I was taking a dump I had to rub one out and I shabated.

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shababy

When didn’t know you were pregnant and had to fart, so you try to blow ass but instead of gas you push a baby out like a horrible shart.

I was at Burger King and the damn girl in front of me ended up farting and having a Shababy. The manager gave me a free chocolate milkshake though so it was cool.

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Melananus

The type of cancer one is afflicted with when you foolishly try to absorb vitamin D directly from the sun to your anus.

Did you hear about Karen? She tried that stupid holding her naked ass up to the sun to absorb more vitamin D and ended up getting melananus.

Ass tar

The sticky, unyielding, slow moving, and clingy eradication of Thanksgiving dinner, usually encountered the following day.

Man I ate so much turkey, stuffing, and gravy that I had some nasty ass tar the next day.