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queer beard

Someone who you coauthor with who has a marginalized gender identity or sexual orientation (e.g. LGBT2Q+), in order to credibly discuss issues of gender as a cishet person. Could equally apply to people of marginalized racial identities (see race beard).

That guy only writes with so-and-so so he can talk about queer topics without being attacked, and get into those progressive journals! I would go as far to say he's using them as a queer beard...

by secretuser420 April 8, 2020


Freudian autocorrect

A Freudian slip made by inadvertently texting someone what you unconsciously meant, and then saying it was autocorrected text (even when it's super implausible that it autocorrected to that).

/SMS dialogue/
gf: I feel rough af, think i'm getting sick
bf: Take some penis, it'll make you feel better

bf: Echinacea*. Damn Freudian autocorrect.
gf: ahaha. there is no way it autocorrected to that
bf: it Freudian autocorrected

by secretuser420 December 5, 2022


Sigh offensive

The use of loud obnoxious sighing as a passive aggressive attack on people in your proximity, usually in attempt to clear them from a room or at least annoy them.

"My office-mate keeps was on an all out sigh offensive yesterday. It made it impossible to get anything done, I was so annoyed, I just left and went to work at home!"

by secretuser420 January 23, 2023


Gynecologist

Slang for psychologist, usually used among self-deprecating men who undergo therapy.

I saw my gynecologist today. He's my therapist... Because I'm a big pussy.

by secretuser420 February 28, 2023


iron dome

Israeli fellacio

American boy: "Man, I don't want to go on birthright... the shameless propaganda insults my intelligence."
Friend of Ab: "Dude, just take the trip. And don't miss out on the iron dome."

by secretuser420 May 6, 2022

1πŸ‘ 2πŸ‘Ž


Iron dome

Getting a blow job (i.e., fellatio) from an Israeli Defense Forces (IDF) soldier, typically while on Birthright.

Typically from a woman soldier, but Israel is the most socially progressive country in the middle east (that doesn't say much, true), so it could be from a guy too...

See also: Girthright

Friend 1: Dude I don't want to go on birthright, it's such a Zionist scam.
Friend 2: Just go take the trip so you can get that iron dome!

by secretuser420 June 21, 2022

1πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


intersectional oppression

When oppressive forces like military or police try to be progressive or worldly, not realizing that doing so is innately impossible and the contradiction just ends up satirizing themselves. Prominent examples include police learning to meditate or drone operators wearing hijabs.

I hear the military is teaching its new recruits about critical race theory! That's so rad.
Dude, that's not rad at all. It's cringy af to see how agents of state violence learning crit theory. How clueless are they?
Hey, intersectional oppression is a step is better than unenlightened brutality. Maybe this will help them realize how they're all pawns and expedite the obsolescence of the state?

by secretuser420 May 9, 2022

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