Bong

A long, wide thin item. Specifically used for drinking and sucking, or for experiments. Basically for anything that's long. Or small balls, or thick balls.

My big bong's stuck!
Nah, really? Fine, i'll help. Shit, the things i do for you man
He whips out his bong
Damn! Thats a big bong!

Mopped

To be sweeped, or be bad at something.

“bro I'm so mopped”
“Nah, go mew”