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bicycle inner tube

1. Designed to be used by young men as a sex subsitute.
2. Can also be used to inflate bicycle tyres.

I don't have a girlfriend because I'm very shy, but I have a bicycle inner tube.

by soreofhing July 6, 2009

356πŸ‘ 67πŸ‘Ž


drink

Something that wives keep count of when you are at a party.
For example, after a couple of hours laughing and joking with the men, your wife will sidle up to you and say in a very accusing tone of voice "That's your fourth drink, you know".

That's your fourth drink, you know.

by soreofhing July 6, 2009

741πŸ‘ 163πŸ‘Ž


bean counting

What young men are apt to do in cold countries.
It usually consists of sitting and watching young girls and women as they pass, and observing their nipple areas to see if they have pursed up due to the cold, and consequently make a prominent hard bean shape under their tight fitting blouse or tee shirt.
It is a competitive sport and he who legitimately counts the most beans in an agreed time, wins.

I saw a poor girl this morning when I was bean counting with Bob; she was really cold.

by soreofhing July 6, 2009

335πŸ‘ 46πŸ‘Ž


wanker's cramp

British slang:
To wank is slang for masturbating, usually understood to be carried out on a man by someone of either sex.

Wanker's cramp is laughingly used to describe any hand pain, with the understood meaning that the person with the pain often masturbates.

You say your hand hurts. You must have wanker's cramp.

by soreofhing July 6, 2009

616πŸ‘ 75πŸ‘Ž


hair to grow on the palm of your hand

When an innocent young man is seriously told that masturbation will cause hair to grow on the palms of your hands, he will often immediately look at his hands thus causing raucous laughter from the others.

Did you know masturbation causes hair to grow on the palm of your hand?

by soreofhing July 6, 2009

570πŸ‘ 123πŸ‘Ž


tea leaf

Rhyming slang for a thief

Where's my pencil gone? You've got it, you tea leaf!

by soreofhing July 5, 2009

426πŸ‘ 92πŸ‘Ž


left hander

The rather difficult task of masturbating with the left hand while using the right hand on a mouse to navigate porn on the Internet.
With practice you can become ambidextrous; however that in no way discriminates against ambidextrous men who are born that way.

When my mother goes to the supermarket I have a quick left hander.

by soreofhing July 6, 2009

372πŸ‘ 67πŸ‘Ž