Chickin pickin

Eddie Van Halen’s guitar playing between the time periods 6:15-6:29 in the song “Pleasure Dome.” Very light, fast, and requires excellent guitar “picking” skills.

“There goes Eddie chickin pickin again.”
“How on earth does he do that??”

Creek chub

A fat guy floating down a river in an inter tube. Usually shirtless and sunburnt.

Wow dude, look at that fat guy floating down the river. That’s a creek chub!!

Broody hen

A mother-in-law with a slightly downturned face that silently judges everything you say to your spouse.

"Wow, my husband's mother is really being a broody hen today!!"

Homeschool attire

Boys wear cheap, Walmart jeans that are usually too short and are pulled up too high, with a plaid button-down shirt tucked into it. Socks are white crew socks, and shoes are cheap New Balance sneakers that often have grass stains on them. Usually consist of a short haircut and round glasses.

Girls wear plain skirts or dresses that drop down to the shins. Designed to not call attention to the body.

"Look at that homeschool group, they are wearing such homeschool attire!"

Toad drowner

A very heavy rainfall, usually resulting from a heavy thunderstorm. Usually will force toads to the surface, as they can be flooded out if they remain underground. Also known as a toad strangler.

Wow Jim, we got a real toad drowner last night! I got 1.77 inches in my gauge, how much did you get?

Floater

1). A floater is a crumb of communion bread that is deposited when multiple people eat a piece of communion bread first and then drink out of the same communion cup. Typically seen when children take their first communion.

2). Occurs when someone poops in a pool. You can be relaxing by the pool and see a giant turd float past you, also known as a "floater."

3). A fat guy floating in an inter-tube either in a lazy river or a creek. Usually very slow-moving and impedes river traffic.

"Did you guys see that floater?!?"

Homeschool wedding night

When both you and your spouse were homeschooled and just got married, but you literally have no idea what to do on your wedding night because your fundamentalist pastor preached how bad sex was at least once a month. Usually, homeschool wedding nights involve the couple awkwardly sitting on the opposite sides of the bed in homeschool attire (men wear plaid button-down shirts and jeans; the women wear plain dresses) while nervously glancing at each other. Eventually, usually the husband, reaches over and pokes the wife on the shoulder, making her so nervous that she runs out of the room.

"Dude, did you see that Titus and Louise just got married?"
"Yeah man, I bet that was a hilarious homeschool wedding night!"