matey

Matey is a word that, on the face of it, sounds very friendly but, on the other hand with vocal inflection can be used to sound quite the opposite.

1 - "ay-up Jim 'ows it goin' matey"?

2 - Poor old Jim trying to get some kip on a train near Birmingham in the UK keeps getting woken up by some young Yid Geezer singing. "Oy you wouldn't be so fucking happy if this were 1943 on the Reichsbahn matey"!

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Chocolateer

(n) A homosexual. A man who engages in sexual gratification with the rear end of another man.

Oy mate, I wouldn't go in there if you value your ass, it's full of Chocolateers!

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Chavrolet

A truly horrendous, offensively customised car with a roof. Invariably older than its driver and adorned with an ill fitting body kit with a shite paint job, alloy wheels, and a suspension lower than whale shit, rear spoiler and a peashooter exhaust system with one or two horse knobs. Driven by a brain dead chav listening to ear shatteringly loud drum and bass music.

Steve :- Ay-up boys, old Jamie's really excited about getting his chavrolet back from the repair shop. 's gorra nuther sticker on it.
Guy :- Yeah shite innit?
Richard :- Wunt have it in me driveway!
Tosh :- Fuckin rangum!
Mike :- Waste of money, time and space!
ALL :- AYE!!

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skinternet

Agree also with Gregg (thumb up).
This British definition applies to BBC / ITV ceefax or teletext. Refer Skint = no dosh for subs and internet = supposedly free information network. No payment to use ceefax henceforth skinternet.

Thought for the day guys and girls - what if the guy who invented the internet (good ol' boy) patented it or whatever and charged us sorry arsed buggers for a crack at this newfangled wonderful invention every time we clicked on a link, say 0.001 penny a time. Well he would be so fucking rich that even Bill Gates would look poor by comparison and the rest of the prolateriat would be ultimately forced to use the skinternet.

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Muckdonalds

Muckdonalds. 'nuff said!

My kids actually said that they'd rather eat the cardboard box as it probably had more flavour than the shit posing as food it contained! True! They've called it Muckdonalds ever since.

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peashooter

(adj) The length of exhaust pipe that runs from the cylinder head to almost the rear of a chavs car. The rest of the exhaust system is completed at the very rear by one, or sometimes two (even though it's only got an inline 4, poxy 1.3 litre 4 banger) horse knob tailpipe(s).

Paul :- Did you see that Ford KA yesterday with that outragrous horse knob?
Dave :- Yeah, worra wanker. They should stick to the stock peashooter system.

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Deltic

(n) A diesel engine where the cylinder arrangement is in the form of an equilateral triangle operating from three crankshafts (one at each apex) geared together to form one output shaft. As the pistons are opposed the engine is a 2 stroke type. The 9 cyl and 18 cyl types were used in high powered military vehicles, high powered marine MTB's and high powered high speed British locomotives. The Deltics ran from London to Scotland on the east coast mainline from 1960 to 1981. Six Deltic locos are preserved.

The 10 o' clock from Kings Cross to Edinburgh was hauled by class 55 Deltic D9009 Alycidon.

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