RAM

This term has a long and hairy past. It's an abbreviation for the term "Run Away Muff". Many of us have had the unfortunate encounter with one of these wildnerness beast while doing a bit of muff diving. There is a thin line between a full on bush and a R.A.M. A RAM tends to extend into the party trail (simulating a continuous path of no return), whereas a bush is simply unkept and in need of some trimming.

Mild RAMs can be dealt with using a razor and some free time. A severe case can call for a hedge trimmer and an entire afternoon. Please use discretion when encountering a moderate to severe specemin.

Her RAM was so bad, it looked like there was a black guy from the seventies stuck in her happy place.

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Tom Brandon

An incredibly intelligent, humerous and bloody sexy individual with a mammoth wang. People can sense this man's manliness as soon as he steps into the room.

Kate: Mmmmm, my sugar muffin is getting wet.

Graham: Ooh, do I turn you on then?

Kate: Nope. I can sense a Tom Brandon nearby. God, I want his salty sausage in my shit's creek!

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